Dear Daddy

There's a vacancy in my heart
Where your love should have been
the bedtime stories
forehead kisses
first date
and the broken heart made whole by your hand
but instead there's bittersweet
pseudo memories
and what ifs

And although you love from afar
it still feels like
square peg in round hole
a cavern of doubts and fears
separated by time, space and relationship

In all this I know God has His hand on me
on us
guiding us through this quandary of emotions
hoping just for once we wouldn't
ignore
the elephant in the room
the unanswered questions
the longing in our souls
for the wrongs the be made right
desiring forgiveness to take root
in both our hearts
praying for the moment you look into my eyes and call me daughter
and there's a peace in my heart
because I know what we have is real
genuine
authentic
and shaped in reality

Storm Before the Calm

Pretty hectic since Friday. I went to see my cousin Ricky in ICU Friday morning and by the afternoon, he was on life support. He had a good day Saturday, but now he's worse than before. All of this on top of everything else...I've learned that I can't always react immediately based on how things look. God is in control. No matter how cliche it sounds, when it's from the heart, it takes on a totally different importance. And yes, I'm back to feeling a bit overwhelmed, but I believe God when he says, "My grace is sufficient". I'm learning to be like Jesus when he had the peace of God while it stormed all around. When He's ready, He'll say "Peace, be still" and we'll move onto the next obstacle.

True Colors

Floyd and I absolutely LOVE your engagement photos!! It's so funny how we both just stared at them in amazement because we were shocked that we were looking at ourselves. We look good and we look good together. We both have our own issues about our appearance and I think we both had a boost of self esteem yesterday. I'm elated at what God is doing for us and excited that our love for each other and our personalities are showing through our photos. When you just let go and let God, He'll take care of it and surprise you every time.